CHARLOTTESVILLE, Va. (NEWSPLEX) -- A recording of an interview of the woman at the center of the retracted Rolling Story "A Rape on Campus" offers the first chance to hear directly from "Jackie."
Author Sabrina Rubin Erdely's interview took place in September 2014, two months before the Rolling Stone article was published, and it sheds light on the seemingly close relationship Jackie had developed with Erdely.
"It's hard because not a lot of people can understand, you know, what you're going through," Jackie told Erdely.
In the recording, Jackie said she suffered from depression and suicidal thoughts, particularly in September, the month she claimed to have been gang raped in the Phi Kappa Psi fraternity house in 2012.
Jackie said her alleged assault at the Phi Kappa Psi fraternity haunts her.
"I always have a very similar nightmare of walking up to that room," she said. "And it's like, I'm going, but I'm telling myself not to."
Over the course of the two-and-a half-hour conversation, Jackie and Erdely discuss what details will be included in the article. Jackie said she wasn't worried about her real first name being used, but she didn't want to name the frat.
"I feel like a lot of people already know I'm in it," she said. "I'm just scared of naming that particular fraternity."
They talk about Liz Seccuro, who was sexually assaulted at Phi Kappa Psi in 1984 and whose story of gang rape is eerily similar to Jackie's. Jackie knows about Seccuro's memoir, "Crash into Me," but she tells Erdely she hasn't read it.
"I still have yet to read the book," she said. "Probably because I'm afraid it will bring up a lot of...even, like, a lot of similarities."
Jackie also told Erdely she asked Dean Nicole Eramo why the University of Virginia didn't make its rape statistics public. Eramo's response, as told by Jackie, became the centerpiece of the multi-million-dollar defamation suit Eramo filed against Erdely and Rolling Stone.
"I don't want to get her in trouble for saying this," Jackie told Erdely. "But she looked at me very solemnly and was like, 'Well, who would want to send their daughter to the rape school?"
Click on the link alongside this story to hear the audio of the entire interview. It's about two and a half hours.